3sal_alnahrain
01-06-2009, 04:30 AM
this is some articals
for Dr. Robin i thought u might like them
http://static.oprah.com/images/200806/oaf/20080601_oaf_rsmith_1_220x165.jpg
************ *
NO.1
RISK OF LOVE
Do you love with all of your heart, or do you shy away from such deep loving because you're afraid of getting hurt? Dr. Robin says it is so much better to open our hearts wholly and to take that risk of love.
Dr. Robin says that if you are guarded—if you are trying to protect yourself from hurt—you are diminishing your ability to experience love at its fullest, at its best, at its richest. "It's far more rewarding to have lived your life having experienced true, deep, profound love that may have left sooner than you wanted or needed, but still you had that experience than to have never had it at all," Dr. Robin says.
Where are you on this scale? In your own life right now, how willing are you, how open is your heart to love, deeply and profoundly? Dr. Robin says taking the risk to love is important because all we're really left with in life is how we were able to love—ourselves and love other people.
NO.2
THE REAL YOU
Who are you, really? Who is the real you? Are you really the person who dresses to the nines at the office, or is the real you more comfortable in jeans and a T-shirt? Maybe you drive a fancy car…but you can't really afford it.
Dr. Robin says the real you isn't defined by the things you have. "The makeup, the clothes, maybe the degree, maybe the kind of car you drive or the neighborhood you live in—those things are just trappings," Dr. Robin says. "It doesn't make you successful or generous; it doesn't make you nice or kind.
"Really, who you are at your core has a lot to do with what your values are, what you really believe in, whether or not you feel safe enough to tell people who the real you is."
Dr. Robin urges us to rid ourselves of the fear of letting others know who we really are. Don't be afraid that you'll be rejected, neglected or laughed at. True self-esteem requires that another human being knows fully who you are, Dr. Robin says. "Let someone see your warts and your blemishes, your beauty and your brilliance, the places where you've made stumbles and failures and blunders, and the places in which your resilience has surprised you…the real you," Dr. Robin says.
NO.3
LOVE THE Qs
How many times have you said to yourself, "I'm searching for the right answer." For example—Do I keep the job? Do I stay in the marriage? Where should I live? Should we adopt a child?
Oftentimes, we're not getting good answers to our questions. Dr. Robin says it's because we're asking ourselves the wrong questions. "You've got to learn to love the questions," she says. How do you think you can make the right decisions, whatever they may be, if you're not asking the right questions?
Dr. Robin says, in her own life, she's asked a question over and over and over again, only to get the same answer over and over and over again. "Start loving the questions—not just tolerating the questions you need to ask, but begin to love them, to see them as your pathway," she says. In many cases, when you focus on changing the question to the correct one, the answers come easily. "They're the lights; they're the candles that are going to get you to the very place that you've been looking for," she says.
Dr. Robin says to think about something that you've been trying to find the answer to. Begin to ask yourself new, specific, concrete questions, she says—those questions will become your candles, your flashlights that light your way to the answers and decisions.
NO.4
LIVE IN UR OWN WORLD
Have you ever thought it would be better to live in someone else's world rather than to live in your own? Perhaps you thought it would be easier to conform to their beliefs rather than challenge them. Or maybe you decided it would be safer to follow their rules than create your own.
Although at times it may seem easier to reshape ourselves to fit someone else's life, the only place that you can really thrive in is a world that you create, design and shape. "If you don't live in your own world, if you don't choose to embrace that which is uniquely yours—who you are, what you value, what you believe in, what is good for your own soul and spirit and mind—you can't live in that other person's world," she says.
Dr. Robin says that even though you may fear rejection, or losing a friendship, or ending up alone, what you should really be concerned about is abandoning your own sense of self. "This is all really speaking to the issue of fear, how afraid you are right now to be who it is you are, how scared you are … [that] you're going to end up being by yourself," she says. "That's simply not true."
Decide today to desire and dwell in your own life, Dr. Robin says. "You've got to report fully for duty and decide that you're going to embrace the reality that it's absolutely better to live in your own world than to live without yourself in the world of someone else," she says.
NO.5
THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF LOVE
What in the world makes us self-destruct? Why do we harm other people? Why do we dislike people who don't think like us, whose skin color is darker or lighter, whose religious affiliation is different from our own, whose sexual orientation is different?
Dr. Robin says the answer is that there is a lack of self love. Not narcissism, she says, but true self love. "What that means is that if I love myself, I'm able, I'm capable, I'm equipped with what it requires to love somebody else," she says. "I'm talking about loving yourself so much that you would never cause harm to someone, to a community, to a group of people, who are different than you.
Dr. Robin says that when we don't feel good about ourselves, that we act out that poison on others. She says the way to turn the cycle around is to stop condemning ourselves. "We've all said things that are wrong, we've made statements that are biased, we've been unfair," she says. "But … when you speak negatively and say derogatory things about another human soul, another sacred life, you are not just chipping away at their well being, but you are eating away at your own core, at your own sense of goodness and well being."
NO.6
SHAME ON ME
What do you feel shame about? Maybe your marriage is in trouble, or perhaps you don't make as much money as your friends do. Maybe you're embarrassed about the neighborhood you live in or what kind of car you drive. Perhaps you're ashamed that your child doesn't attend an Ivy League school?
Why is it that we always compare ourselves to everyone around us, and why do we feel shameful if we don't match up to their standards? Dr. Robin says shame is so toxic—it not only hurts our ability to see clearly, it keeps us from being true to ourselves and to others. Oftentimes, shame causes us to lie and try to cover things up. "Why would I lie? Because of shame. Because I'm afraid that somehow if I tell you the truth, you will judge me," Dr. Robin says.
Dr. Robin says it's imperative to rid yourself of shame. "Life is meant for you to live freely and abundantly, and shame is a weight that will steal and rob us of what is our divine birthright," Dr. Robin says. "You and I are to go into our lives today a little lighter…that somehow that burden of shame and guilt and not being 'good enough'—you let it roll off your back!"
NO.7
WHEN U R WRONG
Have you ever been wrong in your life—whether it was a speeding ticket or something in your marriage—when you knew you were wrong? Perhaps you knew your attitude was nasty, you knew that your tone was unkind, you knew that you needed to come home after work and apologize?
Dr. Robin says there's a good chance that you know you're wrong about something right now—but aren't willing to admit it. Oftentimes, things like pride, arrogance or fear prevent us from owning up to our mistakes, she says. Scan your life, your relationships and your dreams, Dr. Robin says, and ask yourself, "Where is it that I've shown up wrong and I haven't owned it; I haven't admitted it?"
Instead of wasting time and energy by not admitting when you are wrong, Dr. Robin suggests taking responsibility and moving forward with power, passion and purpose. "When you're wrong, you're wrong," she says. "That means that you're ready to grow, you're ready to seize this moment and make it everything it can be."
for Dr. Robin i thought u might like them
http://static.oprah.com/images/200806/oaf/20080601_oaf_rsmith_1_220x165.jpg
************ *
NO.1
RISK OF LOVE
Do you love with all of your heart, or do you shy away from such deep loving because you're afraid of getting hurt? Dr. Robin says it is so much better to open our hearts wholly and to take that risk of love.
Dr. Robin says that if you are guarded—if you are trying to protect yourself from hurt—you are diminishing your ability to experience love at its fullest, at its best, at its richest. "It's far more rewarding to have lived your life having experienced true, deep, profound love that may have left sooner than you wanted or needed, but still you had that experience than to have never had it at all," Dr. Robin says.
Where are you on this scale? In your own life right now, how willing are you, how open is your heart to love, deeply and profoundly? Dr. Robin says taking the risk to love is important because all we're really left with in life is how we were able to love—ourselves and love other people.
NO.2
THE REAL YOU
Who are you, really? Who is the real you? Are you really the person who dresses to the nines at the office, or is the real you more comfortable in jeans and a T-shirt? Maybe you drive a fancy car…but you can't really afford it.
Dr. Robin says the real you isn't defined by the things you have. "The makeup, the clothes, maybe the degree, maybe the kind of car you drive or the neighborhood you live in—those things are just trappings," Dr. Robin says. "It doesn't make you successful or generous; it doesn't make you nice or kind.
"Really, who you are at your core has a lot to do with what your values are, what you really believe in, whether or not you feel safe enough to tell people who the real you is."
Dr. Robin urges us to rid ourselves of the fear of letting others know who we really are. Don't be afraid that you'll be rejected, neglected or laughed at. True self-esteem requires that another human being knows fully who you are, Dr. Robin says. "Let someone see your warts and your blemishes, your beauty and your brilliance, the places where you've made stumbles and failures and blunders, and the places in which your resilience has surprised you…the real you," Dr. Robin says.
NO.3
LOVE THE Qs
How many times have you said to yourself, "I'm searching for the right answer." For example—Do I keep the job? Do I stay in the marriage? Where should I live? Should we adopt a child?
Oftentimes, we're not getting good answers to our questions. Dr. Robin says it's because we're asking ourselves the wrong questions. "You've got to learn to love the questions," she says. How do you think you can make the right decisions, whatever they may be, if you're not asking the right questions?
Dr. Robin says, in her own life, she's asked a question over and over and over again, only to get the same answer over and over and over again. "Start loving the questions—not just tolerating the questions you need to ask, but begin to love them, to see them as your pathway," she says. In many cases, when you focus on changing the question to the correct one, the answers come easily. "They're the lights; they're the candles that are going to get you to the very place that you've been looking for," she says.
Dr. Robin says to think about something that you've been trying to find the answer to. Begin to ask yourself new, specific, concrete questions, she says—those questions will become your candles, your flashlights that light your way to the answers and decisions.
NO.4
LIVE IN UR OWN WORLD
Have you ever thought it would be better to live in someone else's world rather than to live in your own? Perhaps you thought it would be easier to conform to their beliefs rather than challenge them. Or maybe you decided it would be safer to follow their rules than create your own.
Although at times it may seem easier to reshape ourselves to fit someone else's life, the only place that you can really thrive in is a world that you create, design and shape. "If you don't live in your own world, if you don't choose to embrace that which is uniquely yours—who you are, what you value, what you believe in, what is good for your own soul and spirit and mind—you can't live in that other person's world," she says.
Dr. Robin says that even though you may fear rejection, or losing a friendship, or ending up alone, what you should really be concerned about is abandoning your own sense of self. "This is all really speaking to the issue of fear, how afraid you are right now to be who it is you are, how scared you are … [that] you're going to end up being by yourself," she says. "That's simply not true."
Decide today to desire and dwell in your own life, Dr. Robin says. "You've got to report fully for duty and decide that you're going to embrace the reality that it's absolutely better to live in your own world than to live without yourself in the world of someone else," she says.
NO.5
THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF LOVE
What in the world makes us self-destruct? Why do we harm other people? Why do we dislike people who don't think like us, whose skin color is darker or lighter, whose religious affiliation is different from our own, whose sexual orientation is different?
Dr. Robin says the answer is that there is a lack of self love. Not narcissism, she says, but true self love. "What that means is that if I love myself, I'm able, I'm capable, I'm equipped with what it requires to love somebody else," she says. "I'm talking about loving yourself so much that you would never cause harm to someone, to a community, to a group of people, who are different than you.
Dr. Robin says that when we don't feel good about ourselves, that we act out that poison on others. She says the way to turn the cycle around is to stop condemning ourselves. "We've all said things that are wrong, we've made statements that are biased, we've been unfair," she says. "But … when you speak negatively and say derogatory things about another human soul, another sacred life, you are not just chipping away at their well being, but you are eating away at your own core, at your own sense of goodness and well being."
NO.6
SHAME ON ME
What do you feel shame about? Maybe your marriage is in trouble, or perhaps you don't make as much money as your friends do. Maybe you're embarrassed about the neighborhood you live in or what kind of car you drive. Perhaps you're ashamed that your child doesn't attend an Ivy League school?
Why is it that we always compare ourselves to everyone around us, and why do we feel shameful if we don't match up to their standards? Dr. Robin says shame is so toxic—it not only hurts our ability to see clearly, it keeps us from being true to ourselves and to others. Oftentimes, shame causes us to lie and try to cover things up. "Why would I lie? Because of shame. Because I'm afraid that somehow if I tell you the truth, you will judge me," Dr. Robin says.
Dr. Robin says it's imperative to rid yourself of shame. "Life is meant for you to live freely and abundantly, and shame is a weight that will steal and rob us of what is our divine birthright," Dr. Robin says. "You and I are to go into our lives today a little lighter…that somehow that burden of shame and guilt and not being 'good enough'—you let it roll off your back!"
NO.7
WHEN U R WRONG
Have you ever been wrong in your life—whether it was a speeding ticket or something in your marriage—when you knew you were wrong? Perhaps you knew your attitude was nasty, you knew that your tone was unkind, you knew that you needed to come home after work and apologize?
Dr. Robin says there's a good chance that you know you're wrong about something right now—but aren't willing to admit it. Oftentimes, things like pride, arrogance or fear prevent us from owning up to our mistakes, she says. Scan your life, your relationships and your dreams, Dr. Robin says, and ask yourself, "Where is it that I've shown up wrong and I haven't owned it; I haven't admitted it?"
Instead of wasting time and energy by not admitting when you are wrong, Dr. Robin suggests taking responsibility and moving forward with power, passion and purpose. "When you're wrong, you're wrong," she says. "That means that you're ready to grow, you're ready to seize this moment and make it everything it can be."